Realness is a quality that is appreciated in every culture on this planet, but in black culture specifically.
When a business venture or investment is described as “Real” there’s an assumption that money is going to be made. A glimmer of hope twinkles in your brain and sparks thoughts of Gold and vacation. Why? Because something described as real is tangible. It’s desirable, fesable, attainable.
When a person is described as real, what are the first words that come to mind?
Dependable, Honest, Consistent, Approachable, Honorable. Cool, Solid and Well- Rounded.
Or even in a different context, you hear someone say, “That hike up Stone Mountain is real.” “Shit Just got real.” You know that means that things are authentic. That the situation at hand is a task, and not for show.
Now, my reason for all that introductory shit? Simple.
The term real nigga has progressively crept it’s way into the vocabulary of Black America. Whether one heard aforementioned term from their surroundings, film, music so on and so forth, there’s no doubt that “Real Nigga” is apart of our vernacular.
My question to you all is elementary.
What makes a “Real Nigga”?
With the help of my staff and a few people that I hold near to my heart, (Fatmama, Kenyarte, Lamar, Corey, Britany, Thank you.) I was able to answer that question and compille traits of realness into one post.
Without further ado, I proudly present to my wonderful readers,
The Top Five Traits of Realness.
1. Honesty, Honesty, Honesty.
The truth hurts, but sometimes it just is what it is. Just keep it real, 1000 percent and see how far you go. Even if it seems like lying is the better option, it’s not. Keeping up with lies is hard work and a stressful business. The truth will always set you free. Even if you hurt a motherfucker’s feelings in the process, they’ll appreciate the fact that you cared enough to be honest with them.
The real are not only honest with others, but honest with themselves. People will get up every day, look themselves in the eye and blatantly lie to the only person in the mirror. Fuck that. Be honest with yourself and make you a better you. That’s real shit.
2. Sticking to Your Word Like Adhesive.
Be there if you say you’re going to be there. Have the money if you say you’re going to have it. Get the job done if you say you can. If there’s something that you can’t do, don’t ever put yourself in moral debt by saying that you can.
You only have one chance to make a first impression. After that? The brain of the other person has already decided what they think of you. Just imagine if you lied, flexed or faked.
Your word is EVERYTHING. When people describe you, reliability should be amongst the first adjectives they speak. Nobody likes a flake dog. All a man has is his balls and his word.
That’s real shit.
3. Being Thorough.
“I’m a thoroughbred nigga, I don’t fake and I don’t hate.”
Thank you, Clifford Harris.
The real are thorough in every sense of the word. Real niggas don’t half ass. My pops always told me that no matter what I did, that I needed to do it to the best of my ability. So from cleanliness, to financial stability, to actions, make sure that you’re thorough all the way through.
A large portion of being thorough is consistency. Being a grown ass man is being consistently consistent. Consistency is respected in every faction of life. Kanye is the best because he’s consistent. Kevin Durant has scoring titles and an MVP because he’s consistent.
Day in, day out, night in and night out, make sure that you’re putting up points in life.
That’s real shit.
A real nigga gives respect as much as he demands it. Respect that was earned from being honest, thorough and one of their word. See what I did there?
Respect your woman enough not to be in the streets embarrassing her with hoe nigga antics. Respect your homies enough not to attempt to move in on their past lovers. Respect your enemies enough to never underestimate them. Respect your family enough to represent them in a positive light, even if they don’t represent themselves in that way.
Respect is all about reciprocity. Remember, do good and good will come to you
The light is in you my nigga. That’s real shit.
5. Holding Shit DOWN.
Emotional control is what sets the men apart from the boys. When you get your feelings hurt, suck that shit up and use your outlets. Maintain your dignity and don’t compromise your fortitude by giving in to weakness.
You never bash someone that you laid with, because they’re your equal. You never talk sideways about a person you were in love with, because you loved each other at some point.
And under no circumstances do you ever, ever leak nudes publicly.
Don’t be a bitch, my nigga.
You have to be able to hold water as a real nigga. Mind your business and stay out of unnecessary mess. Drama is like a daycare, it’s for women and children.
That’s real shit.
Often the terms “Street Nigga” and “Real Nigga” get confused. They are not synonymous. Being in the streets doesn’t make you real, solid qualities make you real. Every man has to live by a code, whats yours? What words are synonymous with being a real nigga? Honor. Fortitude. Reliability. Being a real nigga is being a real man.
Some people are born real, others are bred. If you don’t posses all of these qualities yet, be trying to. You become more solid as time passes and you learn. Some people take a different road to realness, but the destination remains the same.
Honesty, Integrity, Self-Control, Consistency, Reliability. The makings of a man.
Thank you readers for fucking with my work. It means a lot to me. To those who know me personally, always remember my #1 rule of writing.
Practice what you post.
See you guys Wednesday.