Pick Your Battles

Do you remember what it was like being a male adolescent and dealing with your Mother?

There were moments in time where she would trip about absolutely nothing or make up ridiculous scenarios that didn’t correlate at all. (“Malcolm how are you going to go to college and you can’t even take the damn trash out?”)  Now if you were lucky, you had a father figure around to step in and balance out the crazy that naturally brews inside of a woman. If not, you’re probably an adult misogynist now cause you secretly have Mommy issues.

See, there were times that your mom was legitimately wrong and being completely irrational, but you being a child were in no place to say anything because challenging your Mom’s ridiculousness was interpreted as disrespect. In reality, you were probably subjected to dealing with mild to severe insanity for moments at a time. Now you didn’t know it then, but dealing with these bursts of psychosis on a consistent basis was preparing you to deal with your own maniac whenever you decided to fall in love.

I know that my female readers are looking at this article and probably stating misogyny, generalization and chauvinism, when that isn’t the case at all. Every human being is a lunatic. Some are more psychotic than others, but in all honesty… normalcy and sanity are relative terms created by people who didn’t even understand themselves. This is why people are always trying to be normal or trying to be functional or trying to get their shit together or if their shit is together they’re trying not to fuck it up. We are all crazy. Now in my travels and experiences i’ve learned that women are the amplifiers and enhancers. Anything that you give a woman, she can make into something more. I know you have all heard the cliche phrases Sperm into a child, house into a home, materials into a meal, etc. This ideology also applies to emotion. Any traits that you have inside of you, a woman has the same traits amplified TENFOLD. Does anyone see any lies?



Every day in life  I see young men going back and forth with women about a plethora of subjects. Whether it be a battle of the sexes, sports or a political view, it pains me to see these younglings so misguided and frustrated when trying to get their point across to the opposite sex. Now it may be ignorance or a lack of fucks to give, but in several cases I think that some men don’t know any better. You don’t negotiate with terrorists.

I’m not saying to completely ignore a woman’s foolishness, that would be rude and disrespectful. What I am saying is to be strategic in your approach because the doing the wrong thing could yield terrible results.

Don’t argue with women, just don’t. It’s an uphill battle, you’re wasting your breath, and even if you’re right and have valid points, examples, a slide show and witnesses, she won’t acknowledge any of that OR the fact that she’s wrong until the emotion subsides an hour to a day or two later.

How they feel is all that matters.

As a man you have to learn to enhance your vocabulary with filler words to satisfy the appetite of a woman when she’s ready to argue. “Alright.” “For sure.” “Yes.” “Okay.” “Okay babe.”With these filler words you also have to develop a filler tone that isn’t fake, condescending, or sarcastic. If it is, they’ll notice and make an argument out of that too.

Under no circumstances do you ever get emotional and let her see the foundation crack. Women are lovely, but when it comes to emotion they are like sharks in the water man. They smell blood and they attack. The insatiable appetite rises and they start to pry at whatever wound you’ve mistakenly showed them. They smell you getting annoyed when you’re trying to keep your composure. They smell you getting angry because they’re repeatedly asking the same questions over and over again. The second that you give that energy emotionally they may as well smile and say “gotcha!”

You just have to let them have it. Let them feel like they’re right or let them feel like whatever the fuck that they have going on is important enough to want to fight about.

The best way to be is firm and solid. You’ll get to a point where your woman will not to even bring the bullshit to your door because she knows she isn’t going to get what she wants… a reaction. Trust though, every now and then she’ll try you with some bullshit to make sure that you’re still solid and you better be on point.

In the event that you do cave in emotionally, tighten up and get your shit together quickly. If the argument gets to a screaming or physical point, remove yourself from the situation. I don’t care what she says. If it gets too intense, leave.

When it comes to non-family members and women you aren’t dating, don’t even waste your time. You can completely ignore them with no consequences. Do you guys ever see what happens to the random guys who try and argue with women on your timeline? They get torn to fucking shreds just for having an opinion. If you didn’t know by now, you aren’t entitled to an opinion if you aren’t handsome, witty and or rich. If you’re lucky enough to be either of those or all three, there will be something else for them to attack. Fragile ego, little dick, not having a mother growing up, SOMETHING.

Why do women like to argue? Is it because they want to transfer negative energy? Do they want to see if you genuinely give a fuck about them? Or is it because its a part of their genetic makeup? Who knows. Point is, its very tiring to argue about thing that don’t matter. So, choose your battles wisely.

And finally!

If a woman is completely wrong, you’ll know because she will be nice and sweet about whatever it may be. If she has the smallest inkling that she’s right, she will try and fight you about it. If not, she will be a sweetheart  and you can fucking quote me on that.

Until next wave.

-International Malcolm


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