Black Twitter Ain’t Shit. 

Why isn’t social media social?
The privatization of social media discredits the term. The true concept of social media is to reduce the 6 degrees of separation theory exponentially by providing a way for the average joe to reach millions across a cyber platform. With that platform readily available to average joes, cool kids, and celebrities all at once it should bridge the gap between fan and fame. 

But what does social media really do? 

It specially outcasts the majority  while simultaneously giving that one in a million an incomparable 15 minutes of fame on an almost hourly basis. Every 3 or 4 months or so there’s a new vine sensation, or a new Instagram beauty popping up who has miraculously walked the earth in secrecy until her newfound internet fame…

So is it a blessing or a curse? 

The average joes who get their 15 minutes don’t get whopping salaries and perks like the Internet leads them to believe. In a lot of cases that 15 minutes of fame and fortune ends with 15yrs of poverty n pain. Just take a look at it, hypothetically. 

 Our subject’s name is Sarah. Sarah was the finest girl in the tri county area of a very under populated rural Idaho or some shot like that. A place where the talent/beauty pool is not of high quality or standards. However, Sarah breaks free of rural Idaho by attending college in a big city. While in college Sarah gains the attention of all the city folks who see a fresh pretty face; that coupled with her clockwork selfie postings on Instagram and thirst traps on Twitter, Sarah has also acquired a large following of hormone crazed youngsters, and old dofs alike by the second semester freshman year. Then comes the barrage of offered club hostings and paid appearances, sparkling bottles of champagne, flat tummy teas, and teeth whiteness, which Sarah takes full advantage of. Time goes on and with $1,000 here $500 there, week after week Sarah notices that she hasn’t been to class in months. But, she’s making money. 

More money than her parents are back home, enough money to pay off her state school student loan, enough to buy a decent car, enough to get her own apt. Sarah is no longer existing as a college student, but living. She’s rubbing shoulders with Musicians, taking vacations, eating the finest of shrimps and such, but Unfortunately, beauty fades and seasons change. The next batch of fresh faces has come along. The hosting and appearance offers have dwindled away. Now our character is only 19 with no education, no resume and no understanding. 

Just a bunch of pictures and likes. 

What else is there for Sarah to do? Go back to school with her tail tucked between her legs, having to take out another loan because you splurged all her cash on frivolous material things? Nah. That’s not an option. Pride won’t let her do it. Pride is a monster, it’ll make you sacrifice some dignity in order to keep itself alive. Boom! Sarah starts stripping to keep her appearance afloat. She could easily go on back to school and live the dorm room life, but she’s eons beyond that point.  Her Instagram selfies are a little different now, a tad more risqué. She’s making money again but she hasn’t learned much. Appearances must be kept up, even if it’s all a facade Sarah must still look the part. Never let em see you hurting, they say. Never let them see you down, never let them see you sweat. 
Stories like this happen every day. Behind every great fortune, there is a great crime. 

Social media manipulates the minds of the people so much that it influences particular groups to feel cooler than they really are. They procure this sense of self entitlement to things that they wish they had access to but really don’t. Amongst the cool kids, it’s the ones who lie to themselves more than others who suffer this the most. 

They tell themselves that since they were roommates with the concert’s promoter and gained access to backstage and got to share a blunt with the headlining act that they are in fact part of that headliner’s in crowd. You see them tweet “Back stage with Wiz gettin hella high…Taylor’d” and posting selfies while Wiz has his head turned. Never do you ever see Wiz post a picture of them two shoulder to shoulder, or tweet that it was cool seeing his long time friend Joe Schmoe. 

Or those high ranking Twitter cliques who are always arguing, creating drama and chaos on the timeline or looking for a reason to attack someone. It’s bullshit! You see them going back and forth with one another on a daily basis, always trying to outcast a fellow tweeter, assassinate their character or prove some sort of pseudo-importance or superiority. Something I’ve learned through sociology  is that no being wants to perceived as weak. Opposed to physical fighting it seems as if in this day and age on social media, who ever is the best manipulator, has the best jokes or the biggest following wins. 

Be weary of the “cool kids” with thousands of followers but only follow 369 fucks just like them. They’re inadvertently lying to themselves seeming like they’re trying to impress or shit on others when in fact they’re just trying to give reason to love themselves. 

If you’re offended, I’m talking about you. 

We all indulge in social media because we desire something. Access, an opportunity, a connection. The chance to feel a connection to a person thousands of miles away from you. The opportunity to laugh until your sides split open as an awards show or basketball game is on. Access to an admired celebrity and thier thoughts. 

Social media has unimaginable, immense power. Jobs, celebrity status, marriages and children all have been fostered from this platform, but assholes would rather use its capability to argue about $200 dates, student loan debt and weekly salary. 

All because they’re insecure about what they make. But hey, You can be anything you want on the Internet! 

So until next time, always remember, everyone is better than everyone, no one on Twitter has ever struggled and $12/HR is a stack a month. 

International Malcolm and Ralph Riggs 

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